Okay, maybe not Hillbilly because I think they are further South East of here, but at the very least Redneck!  Oh, I forgot to mention that I’m describing my son’s preschool.  Now I’m sure you are all wondering, “Angie, how can a preschool be considered Redneck?”  Well, let me bring it all into focus for you.

My youngest started preschool this year and goes Monday, Wednesday, and Friday from 8am to 11am.  It’s pretty much just like any other preschool, primary colors everywhere, numbers and alphabet adorn the walls, and ladybug decoration for girls, frogs for boys.  The teacher is amazing and just as lovely as can be.  They have a lizard, and two tiny turtles, and an ant farm.  My son absolutely loves going there and would love even more if he could go all day.

Now you’re probably thinking, “C’mon Angie that sounds perfect”.

And it is  –

If you look past the two dead deer heads hanging on the wall and the six stuffed carcasses lining the bookshelf!  No — I’m not kidding.  Really, I shit you not, there are two dead deer heads hanging on the wall!!  Look, I grew up in a family of hunters and my husband also hunts.  I totally get that, I do.  But, hanging dead animals in a preschool?!!

And then add on top of that the stuffed woodchuck, muskrat, squirrel, field mouse, etc. just staring at you from the bookshelf.  I mean, what the hell — is this a preschool or a taxidermy office?

Couldn’t they just learn about the animals from books or DVD — in their “ALIVE” state?  I mean seriously, right now it’s like they have this creepy little dead audience watching them all through story hour.

Now some of you may think this sounds absolutely fucking crazy and you’d be right.  Luckily, I’ll get over it because I grew up in Redneck country.  Even though this surpasses my “Redneck” level, I must admit that my Redneck still shows from time to time *cough cough* so I guess I can’t be too fucking judgmental.  And, I’m guessing if the least of my worries is dead animals in “da house”, then I should be ever so thankful!  (cause you can’t imagine what a true Redneck can come up with given the right amount of beer and weaponry) –

Anyhowser, I’m still guessing there will be some serious discussions and tears going on in this preschool the first time they watch Bambi together!

Update: I just saw a dead raccoon at the side of the road on the way home from grocery shopping and literally my first thought was, “ooo, I should pick that up for my son’s preschool — I don’t remember them having a raccoon in their menagerie”.  Sick, right?!!

Tags: Bambi, beer, carcass, crazy, dead deer, hillbilly, hood surfing, humor, hunting lodge, preschool, redneck, taxidermy, weaponry

This entry was posted on Sunday, September 21st, 2008 at 11:26 am and is filed under Daily Crazy. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.